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Keep Your Apartment From Feeling Lonely

Many renters are moving into their own apartments for the first time, either through graduation from college, a recent divorce, new job or job transfer. Spending a lot of time alone can compound feelings of loneliness and a feeling of rootlessness. Although many renters enjoy the carefree lifestyle, some never get over a feeling of temporariness, as if their apartments aren't really "home." Do you feel that your new apartment isn't home?

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Poet Maya Angelou once said, "The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned."

For the next six months or a year, you will be occupying your new apartment so you might as well make the best of it. Start with some tips from history's great writers to help you make apartment living more inviting:

  • "Where thou art - that- is home." Emily Dickenson

    If home is where you are, then make your home a reflection of who you are. Put things around you that express your beliefs, emotions and interests. On your next visit to "the folks" ask them to share some mementoes that bring a smile to your soul. Go through some old photographs and put them into fresh new frames for your apartment. Create a grouping of your favorite people. Update your phone list and call at least one person on it weekly. Add fresh flowers. And put your dorm room poster of "The Scream" in the trash.

  • "It is a miserable thing to feel ashamed of home." Charles Dickens

    Even if you do want to invite people over so you won't be as lonely, you won't be as likely to play host if your apartment is uninviting. No one expects you to decorate like something out of Architectural Digest, but they do expect not to have to sit on the floor to watch the game or listen to CD's. Even if you have to start out with mis-matched furniture from the Salvation Army, shop and decorate with hospitality and the comfort of others in mind.

  • "The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it." Ralph Waldo Emerson

    Learn some points of hospitality that will make you feel more comfortable entertaining in your home. A cooking class or wine tasting event can not only introduce you to more people, but give you pointers on easy foods to make and drinks to serve as well as open up new topics of conversation. Start collecting recipes and party ideas from other hosts and hostesses you admire.

  • "The dog is a lion in his own house." a Persian proverb

    Put things around you of your own choosing. Your home is a place where you can express yourself, and your first apartment is an ideal time to explore interests of your own. If you want to decorate with your favorite football team's colors, or with exotic objects from another country that you may want to visit some day, go right ahead. Your apartment can be yet another way that you get to learn more about who you are and what you want out of life.

  • "The most fortunate of men, be he a king or commoner, is he whose welfare is assured in his own home." Goethe

    Take care of the basics so that you can enjoy your home. That means taking care of yourself financially, keeping your bills paid and your debt well under control. Personal safety is important, too. Make sure the path to your home is well-lit and the locks on your doors are bolted tight. Keep a list of emergency numbers handy. Get to know your neighbors, so that you are aware of any unusual or suspicious activity.

  • "Let a man behave in his own house as a guest." Ralph Waldo Emerson

    Treat your things with respect. Pick up after yourself. Put away clutter. Treat your home as if you aren't alone.

  • "Tis ever common that men are merriest when they are from home." Shakespeare

    Get out of the apartment when you are feeling blue. Get some fresh air, hear some music, go to the bookstore for a latte and read all the free newspapers. Volunteer your time to a worthy cause. Blow the cobwebs away.

  • Real Times Apartment Articles
  • Published: April 2, 1999

    Use of this article without permission is a violation of federal copyright laws.


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    Today's Headlines 04/02/1999


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