"Each day, and the living of it, has to be a conscious creation in which discipline and order are relieved with some play and pure foolishness." -
May Sarton

Remember playing with a magnet for the first time? How fascinating it was to watch the dynamic of magnetism. the pulling and the pushing? These same dynamics operate in our businesses and relationships. Which are you: attractive or repulsive?

You can become irresistibly attractive! In his book, The Portable Coach, Coach Thomas Leonard, identifies 28 strategies for success that will increase your attractiveness! Leonard is called the father of personal coaching. He created Coachu, a virtual university which has trained over 2000 personal coaches. More information on the Attraction Principles mentioned here, visit www.attractionu.com.

Look over this list of the 28 Principles of Irresistible Attraction: I believe some will surprise you!

1. Become Incredibly Selfish
2. Unhook Yourself from the Future
3. Overrespond to Every Event
4. Build a Super Reserve in Every Area
5. Add Value Just for the Joy of it
6. Affect Others Profoundly
7. Market Your Talents Shamelessly
8. Become Irresistibly Attractive to Yourself
9. Get a Fulfilling Life, Not Just an Impressive Lifestyle
10. Promise Little, Deliver Everything
11. Create A Vacuum That Pulls You Forward
12. Eliminate Delay
13. Get Your Personal Needs Met, Once and For All
14. Thrive on the Details
15. Tolerate Nothing
16. Show Others How to Please You
17. Endorse Your Worst Weaknesses
18. Sensitize Yourself
19. Perfect Your Environment
20. Develop More Character Than You Need
21. See How Perfect The Present Really Is
22. Become an Unconditionally Constructive Person
23. Orient Yourself Around Your Values
24. Simplify Everything
25. Master Your Craft
26. Recognize and Tell The Truth
27. Have a Vision
28. Be Real, Be Human

I'll bet just reading the list has jumpstarted some creative ideas of ways you could better provide value to your clients.

Often we spend a lot of time working on what to do, rather than upgrading who we are. While I believe our clients and customers want experienced, competent and knowledgeable agents, I don't believe that's what will get you the business or keep them coming back. It is who you are that attracts or repels. An extremely pushy and manipulative person, no matter how experienced, competent and knowledgeable they may be, repels clients. In sales, we've been brainwashed over the years to believe we have to be the most aggressive to "win." Ridiculous, I say!

It is, rather, the agent who the client feels comfortable with, who they feel they can trust, that they will choose. By being yourself and working with the highest integrity, congruent with your core values, you will attract. Trying to be something you are not, will repel.

Ask yourself this question: Are you trying to impress or to connect? Perhaps you are trying too hard to fit some profile of successful salesperson that is not you, that is not reflective of the true you and it repels. When you aren't being true to yourself and are trying to be some way you think you need to, you don't exude the natural power and attraction that happens when you are being your best You.!

Let's examine three of these Attraction Principles in more depth:

Strategy #4 - Build a Super Reserve in Every Area

When you believe there is a scarcity of listings, qualified buyers, money or business, struggle and fear are often common. What you focus on expands. The more you see lack, the more lack shows up. The physical world rewards you with your expectations! When you don't need the business is when it comes easily and you naturally attract more. Working like mad to build a super reserve will pay off when the momentum is built. Your reality starts to shift as your internal conversations shift.

Now is a good time to focus on a blitz of activity to have the rest of the year be extraordinary. In the beginning it takes 10 actions to create 1 result. By consistent action, the momentum will build and you'll find 1 action creates 10 results. (You'll begin to find you are getting calls and producing results, not only from the actions you are taking, but completely unrelated business will start showing up. You are stirring up the cosmic dust by taking action.) Just don't stop taking action and lose your focus before it has shifted from concentrated action to momentum!

Strategy # 7 - Market Your Talents Shamelessly

This should go without saying, but I find agents often feel they are imposing when they ask for referrals or tell people they want their business. I request you rethink this whole area for yourself. You are doing them a favor and giving them an opportunity to save a friend time and/or money! Think of a time when someone gave you the name of someone (maybe a doctor, lawyer, CPA or plumber) that was the perfect solution to your problem. Weren't you grateful that you had found someone you could trust? Didn't you appreciate the person who told you? They were a hero! If you deliver the best service and really have taken care of your clients - you set yourself apart from the rest. Don't you think those people whose problems you have already solved are grateful? Wouldn't they like a way to look good? When they recommend you, they look good and you have done them a favor, not asked a favor of them.

You are good! Be proud and shameless! Let those who already know and love you know HOW to tell others about you and know how to be your best supporters. They want to; they just haven't been asked or told how to do it. Make it easy for them.

Strategy #8 - Become Irresistibly Attractive to Yourself

The car must have gas to run and you need to take extraordinarily great care of yourself to have the energy to work miracles for your clients. Stop putting everyone else's needs first. I mean it. Stop it! Start saying No! When your needs are taken care of first, you are less stressed and a more attractive person to be around. Then you can focus on taking care of others. Are you taking at least a day a week off? Are you getting a massage or exercising to keep your body happy? Are you getting enough sleep? Are you spending time with the people who are most important to you? Take out your calendar right now and schedule some personal time. And do something very indulgetn for yourself. If you feel guilty, you are on the right track!

In Julia Cameron's book, The Artists Way, Margaret Young is quoted as saying, "Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; They try to have more money, in order to do more of what they want, so they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want."

Working this month on the who, rather than the what will enable you to have some strategies for the coming year that will upgrade your standards and attract business. Take actions to build that reserve and stir up that cosmic dust!

See what others are saying about this article or make your own views known. Go to the Interactive version.

Published: August 24, 1999

Use of this article without permission is a violation of federal copyright laws.

Editor's Note: This article reflects the opinions of Joeann Fossland only and not necessarily the views of this or any other publication, organization or Website owner.

Joeann Fossland ePRO, GRI, MCC, PMN, SRS is a dynamic, international speaker and business coach. She personally coaches a small number of extraordinary agents who want to leverage their production results and have a life they love! She was recognized as one of the 25 Most Influential Women in Real Estate in 2008 by Stephan Swanapoel. Subscribe to her free Tuesday Tips, attend Fossland's Forums, free monthly tele-seminars, and find out about classes delivered by email and personal coaching by visiting Joeann.com or email her at . You can also connect at Facebook and Twitter.