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November 9, 2009



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Keeping Peace With Your Live-In: Get a Written Agreement Before Your Buy

Q: Within the next year, I will be purchasing property in the District of Columbia. The property and the mortgage will be in my name, but my boyfriend will be living in the property with me. Is there a domestic relations law that would allow the house to be split and sold if in the future, we should split up while we are both living in the property? Is there some way that I would have to relinquish half of my rights or ownership in the property because he will be paying half of the mortgage and utilities?

A: So long as you will be the only one on title, you need not be concerned that you will lose the house, or even a portion of it. However, as an ounce of caution, you and your boyfriend should enter into a written agreement, spelling out your respective rights and responsibilities.

Your boyfriend will be paying half of the mortgage and half of the utilities. Does he have any interest in obtaining half of the property in the future – whether or not you stay together as a couple? Does he believe that he will be obtaining any ownership rights because he is making these payments?

What about furniture? Will you be furnishing the entire house, or will your friend share in these expenses?

What happens should you decide to split? Will you be able to afford to carry the house on your own, or will you need to get a roommate to assist you financially?

If both of you were to go on title, the law is universal in the United States. The courts will not allow two or more people to own property together, when one of the parties wants out of the relationship. This is called a “partition suit,” where one owner sues the others to force a sale of the jointly held property.

According to many legal commentators, “partition is a right much favored,” since it is designed to promote peace. Once the litigation is over, while the parties may continue to feud and fuss at one another, at least the property issues will have been resolved.

But since you will own the property in your own name, as “sole owner”, partition is not applicable. You do, however, want to avoid giving your friend any opportunity to claim an interest in the property, and thus – while you are still talking to one another – now is the time to prepare (and sign) a written agreement spelling out all of the various issues which can arise from your living arrangement.

Here are some of the issues which should be discussed, agreed upon and then reduced to a written document:

  • how much will he pay you on a monthly basis?

  • what is the money for? Perhaps the best approach is to just call the monthly payment “contribution to living expenses”, and not earmark it for any specific items.

  • there are strong laws in our area supporting tenants. Your agreement should state that your friend is not a tenant under applicable Landlord-tenant laws, even though he is paying you money. Try to avoid using the word “rent” in your agreement.

  • what happens should you decide to sell the property? Will he vacate when you do?

  • what happens should he not make the monthly payment? Do you have the right to sue him or ask him to vacate?

  • what about food? Will you keep separate kitchens or will this be shared?

  • will your friend have access to the entire house, or will you want some space for yourself?

    These are some of the difficult questions which you must resolve, before you buy the house. I recognize that it is difficult to discuss these issues, especially if this is your boyfriend. But, people get divorced and couples split. If you are unable to discuss these matters now, think of how more difficult it will be down the road, should problems occur.

    While it may be advisable for both of you to retain your own lawyer for the purpose of drafting up this agreement, you do not need a formal, written document. So long as there is a legible agreement, signed by both parties, this should suffice in the event it is needed in the future.

    We are in a litigious environment, and nowadays, anyone can sue anyone for anything. While I am satisfied that your boyfriend will not have any valid claim of ownership against your title, the written agreement is the best way to assure you that he will not be able to make a claim in the future against your property.

  • Published: November 25, 2002

    Use of this article without permission is a violation of federal copyright laws.




    Author of the weekly Housing Counsel column with The Washington Post for nearly 30 years, Benny Kass is the senior partner with the Washington, DC law firm of Kass, Mitek & Kass, PLLC and a specialist in such real estate legal areas as commercial and residential financing, closings, foreclosures and workouts.

    Mr. Kass is a Charter Member of the College of Community Association Attorneys, and has written extensively about community association issues. In addition, he is a life member of the National Conference of Commissioners on Uniform State Laws. In this capacity, he has been involved in the development of almost all of the Commission’s real estate laws, including the Uniform Common Interest Ownership Act which has been adopted in many states.







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