Want to start up a lively discussion? Next time you're hanging out with a group of real estate agents, bring up the topic of whether or not to require buyer pre-approval and/or a buyer agency agreement prior to showing a home. Many agents proclaim that it's a waste of time to work with a buyer who does not have a pre-approval stamped to his forehead and/or hesitates to sign a buyer agency agreement upfront.

Me? I disagree with all my heart and I have to ask myself, "Are real estate agents in today's market so darn busy with qualified buyers and motivated sellers that they need to actively turn away those who show up at their doors looking for help?" Wow! As I always say in these situations: I love a full pipeline! Send 'em my way! I'll take great care of them and probably sell them a house eventually, as well as to all their friends through the years. And I'll be happy to pay you a referral fee.

I have used the services of many real estate agents in my lifetime and I promise you that if any of them had shown more interest upfront in my financial qualifications than in my housing needs, I'd have found someone else who showed me the respect I think I deserve. And I certainly would not be interested in obligating myself to anyone I barely know. I get bristly just thinking about it.

I submit that many agents are chasing away perfectly good buyers who are 100 percent sincere in their desire to purchase a house -- and are likely perfectly well qualified to do so. But with these disrespectful efforts to tie them down, all they're accomplishing is sending them elsewhere, fulfilling the prophecy that buyers are liars and confirming the belief that stronger "rules" are needed in the future.

I believe that this approach simply irritates buyers, so they look elsewhere for more respectful assistance. I have to wonder if spending time with a buyer without a hint of obligation or pressure might be a much better use of time than fussing so much over whether or not they're worthy of a little time? Relationships take time. There's no way you can know upfront if a buyer will buy, regardless of the pieces of paper they bring with them or are willing to sign. If an agent can't afford the $20 in gas or the two hours of time it might take to create some trust and rapport, then by all means, he'll probably do better referring his potential clients out. And please don't forget. we get serious paychecks when someone buys. Our paychecks more than offset the risk of a little gas money and time.

My friends, most buyers are not liars. Most buyers have better things to do than waste our precious time. Their time is precious, too. They simply want to be treated kindly, and with respect.

Published: May 12, 2009

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Jennifer Allan is a former top producing real estate broker, a published author, a speaker and a trainer. She has written five books a bout the business of selling real estate, including her flagship book: Sell with Soul: Creating an Extraordinary Career in Real Estate without Losing Your Friends, Your Principles or Your Self-Respect. Her new book entitled "If You’re Not Having Fun Selling Real Estate, You're Not Doing it Right!" will be released in early 2010. Jennifer believes that the secret of success for real estate agents is not in aggressive marketing techniques or hard-core sales pitches, but rather in being competent in one's craft. Competence begets Confidence. And in today's world of increasingly suspicious and ad-weary consumers, having an air of self-assurance and enthusiasm will be far more effective than a slick sales campaign. Jennifer writes and speaks with this philosophy in mind. She preaches that salespeople should follow the Golden Rule in their day-to-day practice of business - treating clients and prospects respectfully, as the salesperson him or herself would like to be treated. Being competent, reliable and fair, and motivated by a true desire to earn a paycheck, not just show up at closing with hand outstretched. She is a regular contributor to several real estate newsletters and magazines, a member of the RE/MAX Hall of Fame and one of the industry's most popular bloggers. You can learn more about Jennifer's "soulful" philosophies at www.SellWithSoul.com. Subscribe to Jennifer Allan's Newsletter for SOI'ers Tips & Strategies for Generating Business from Your Sphere of Influence Your Email Address: Your Name: