A few months ago, I had a conversation with a newer agent about maximizing the effectiveness of her open houses. By "effectiveness," of course, she meant gathering as many names, numbers and email addresses as she could during her three-hour stints on Sunday afternoons.

She was frustrated (mostly with herself) at her inability to smoothly gather those names, numbers and email addresses from her visitors. Either they seemed hesitant to provide them or she just wasn't comfortable asking, and usually came away from her open houses empty-handed.

"Jennifer, do you have any suggestions for me?" she asked.

Yes, as a matter of fact, I do! But first, let's have a paradigm shift, shall we? Too often, we real estate agents focus on what we need and want, and hope to persuade our audience to play along. For example, we want that name, number and email address so WE can send a nice little thank-you-for-visiting note and add a warm body to our mailing list, right?

So we come up with all sorts of sly strategies to get that contact information, such as "the seller asks that guests sign in for security purposes," or "if you register, you'll be entered to win a lovely gift basket," or simply "please sign my register so I can show the seller how many visitors we had."

Nothing really wrong with these approaches except that there's nothing in it for the visitor. At least, nothing worth relinquishing their private contact information to a hungry Realtor, suspecting they'll be hounded after the fact whether they want to be or not.

So, what could you do instead to - here's the kicker - inspire the visitor to want you to have his or her contact information? Not what you can do to trick it out of him, but to actually inspire him to want to give it to you?

It's awfully simple.

You have something bona-fide buyers want. Not market reports or newsletters or lovely gift baskets, but knowledge.

You know more about the real estate market and the houses in it than they do. You know the current inventory. You know which houses are priced right and which ones, well, aren't. You know that homes built by this builder cost more than ones by that builder, and why (and whether they're worth the extra). If the neighborhood of your open house is out of the buyer wanna-be's price range, you know of alternative neighborhoods that might work for him. If your open house is On The Lake (and priced accordingly), you know how much of a break a buyer wanna-be can get to be Not On The Lake, But Close. If a buyer wanna-be really wants a big yard, you know where he can find that while staying close enough to town to suit him.

When I say that you know all these things, I don't mean that you have a handy-dandy printout next to your personal brochure and sign-in sheet describing other houses for sale. Nor do I mean that you've memorized your MLS and can spout off DOM's and PSF's and List-to-Sold Ratios with abandon.

I mean that you have a conversational familiarity with your local real estate market. And you're more than willing to share your knowledge and expertise with anyone who is interested.

And you know what else? Not everyone who comes to an open house is a good prospect for you. In fact, most probably aren't, for reasons you're already aware of. Just let 'em go. Don't be rude, of course, but don't fret about getting their digits or demonstrating your expertise to them. Just let them wander thru, politely and pleasantly answer their questions, and relax. You may leave your open house with only one or two folks to follow-up with and that's okay. It's perfectly fine to cherry-pick your future clients, selecting only those with whom you have a natural rapport, who seem to be open to hearing from you again.

Here's the thing. Trying to create rapport with every warm body who walks in the door can be exhausting. And discouraging. Frankly, not everyone wants to be chatted with; in fact, most probably don't. By the end of the open house, if you've tried to build rapport with everyone who came in, you can end up an emotional mess, especially since many of them have probably rejected your advances. But if you save your emotional energy for those with whom you "click," you'll be far more charming!

So, what's the punch line?

1. Be conversationally familiar with the neighborhood, amenities and alternatives to the neighborhood of the house you're holding open and be willing to freely share your knowledge with visitors, and

2. Save your emotional energy for the visitors with whom you feel a natural rapport. Be pleasant and polite to everyone else, but don't stress yourself out trying to get contact information from them.

If you've done a good job preparing for your open house and you choose your targets wisely, you'll be pleasantly surprised to find that many visitors will initiate further contact with you. Either they'll offer up their contact information voluntarily or they'll ask for yours.

If this isn't happening, it's not because you aren't aggressive enough, clever enough or sly enough to coerce those names and numbers from your visitors. So if you want to beat yourself up over the "effectiveness" of your open houses, don't go there. Focus instead on how you can better demonstrate to your visitors that you are the guy or gal they're looking for.

Published: December 16, 2010

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Jennifer Allan-Hagedorn was a top producing real estate broker in Denver, Colorado before writing her first book in 2007. Since then, she has written several more books about the business of selling real estate including her flagship book: Sell with Soul: Creating an Extraordinary Career in Real Estate without Losing Your Friends, Your Principles or Your Self-Respect, the sequel, If You're Not Having Fun Selling Real Estate, You're Not Doing it Right and her latest, to be released in Spring 2011, Prospect with Soul for Real Estate Agents. Jennifer believes that the secret of success for real estate agents is not in aggressive marketing techniques or hard-core sales pitches, but rather in being competent in one's craft. Competence begets Confidence. And in today's world of increasingly suspicious and ad-weary consumers, having an air of self-assurance and enthusiasm will be far more effective than a slick sales campaign. Jennifer writes and speaks with this philosophy in mind. She preaches that salespeople should follow the Golden Rule in their day-to-day practice of business - treating clients and prospects respectfully, as the salesperson him or herself would like to be treated. Being competent, reliable and fair, and motivated by a true desire to earn a paycheck, not just show up at closing with hand outstretched. She is a regular contributor to several real estate newsletters and magazines, a member of the RE/MAX Hall of Fame and one of the industry's most popular bloggers. You can learn more about Jennifer's "soulful" philosophies at www.SellWithSoul.com. Subscribe Below to Enroll in the Daily Seduction Newsletter Mini-Clinic - Tips and Strategies to Generate Business and Referrals From Your Sphere of Influence! Your Full Name Your Email Address