You have undoubtedly heard that you only have one chance at a good first impression. It is important for us to set ourselves apart from the masses at every opportunity. A positive first impression is also a great means of initiating your quest to be trusted and liked by your prospect. We must start somewhere in our process of building relational capital.
When we have solid credentials or are referred by a well-known or prestigious individual, we have a running start to a great first impression. But the first face-to-face meeting is the critical element of the formula for positive influence.
Can you see the difference in and importance of a solid first impression rather than one who goes into negative small talk especially about topics over which they have no control? (Like the weather! … or the economy). And remember to never expound on your personal problems. Cavett Robert used to say that when you share your personal problems with others, 75% of those you tell could care less and the other 25% is glad to hear that you’ve got them!
Always start with a positive greeting. You will impress others as one who will likely be a pleasure to talk to. I know speaker friends who have created entire talks around the importance of the first impression. Here are some examples of how you can respond to the opening question, “How are you?”
1. Ira Hayes - “Great” … simple yet dynamic;
2. Ed Foreman - “Terrific” … positive for sure;
3. Lew Bennett - “Like a million! … I’m not sure what it meant, but it sounded excellent;
4. Zig Ziglar - “Outstanding, but I’ll get better!” … A super answer that will even evoke some laughter;
5. Tom Hopkins – “Unbelievable!” … with that you are covered either way;
6. Carol Prentiss - “Perfect” … How can you beat that one? She and Jim had millions, and that might have had something to do with it;
Then there are those poor deflated souls who just can’t muster a positive answer. They have a dejected tone and answer with comments like …
1. “Not too bad” – this remark is often a person’s way of saying that things are really pretty good in their life, but since they are basically negatively programmed, they feel a need to make a downtrodden remark. Do they think an expression of wholesome optimism is unsophisticated?
2. “Terrible” - Boy, that will get you off to a fine start! From there the pessimist will proceed to elaborate on all of the imperfections of the world his life in it.
3. “I’m all right” – it’s not awfully negative but not very positive either. This is a lukewarm response that won’t set you apart.
4. “I’m getting by” - just getting by huh? I’m not really fired up to talk to you; I like to talk to people who offer hope for optimism and positive results!
OK, I’ve used a lot of ink to delve into a relatively simple concept, but in business, if we are going to get a positive response we must say and do things that contribute to the kind of positive environment that is conducive to success. Another vital reason for a positive response to this simple question is that you are not only setting the stage for the interaction, you are also participating in positive self-talk that can intensify your own conviction!
